THE POWER OF NO: BY BEATRICE NDURA

THE POWER OF NO: BY BEATRICE NDURA

 

No is not a very much celebrated word, it is not embraced warmly. It’s power is hidden from the eyes of many people.  A number of years ago there was a woman who was very committed in our ministry. Her relationship with her husband was rocky and contemplated on divorce. She shared her ordeal with me.  All she wanted from me was a “yes” without giving me an opportunity to listen to the husband”s side of the story. My answer was “no”.  However, she did take it kindly. She was very angry and stopped being part of our ministry.

This helped me to understand that no is the boundary between oneself and the control or influence of family, friends, bosses, co-workers, children etc. No is a vocabulary that is not given much attention; it is a gem that is rarely sought after and it is a hidden power that is not visible to the ordinary eyes. No is rarely used because it is associated with negativity and the price is costly.

If no was a necklace I would always wear it around my neck

No helps me to understand my limits by becoming knowledgeable on my strengths and weaknesses; so that I will not overburden myself or engage in situations that I have no expertise. The word no helps me to protect my walk with God while guarding my heart with all diligence in order to understand my purpose in life and consistently protect what I value. No enables me to build my emotional muscles so that I may resist the accepted norm, as I consider the choices I have and soundly evaluate the consequences. If no was a necklace I would always wear it around my neck as constant reminder on the need to empower myself, protecting my principles and faith in Christ. This precious word helps in setting healthy boundaries with myself and others. 

No is a tough choice

A friend shared a story of a fourteen year old girl who was in a relationship with a fourteen year old boy. This girl threatened to run away, if her mother did not let the boyfriend move in with them. The mother lacked the courage to say no. It was hard to make the tough choice. Instead she agreed to her daughter’s request.

Unlike this mother Moses understood the concept of making tough choices. He made a tough choice when he refused to be called son of Pharaoh”s daughter. Moses chose to suffer with the children of Israel rather than enjoying temporary sinful pleasures of Egypt. He was ready to pay the cost without becoming a Pharaoh pleaser. Moses said no to the wealth and fame of Egypt which was at his disposal.

“By faith Moses, when he became of age, refused to be called the son of Pharaoh”s daughter, choosing rather to suffer affliction with the people of God than to enjoy the passing pleasures of sin.” Hebrews 11:24-25 NKJV

Joseph said no to Potiphar”s wife, who seduced him to immorality. He chose a stand against compromise; and said no to the foreign culture of sin. Choosing to stay true to the God of his fathers, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob; drawing a line between right and wrong and was ready to face the consequences.

“And it came to pass after these things that his master”s wife cast longing eyes on Joseph, and she said, “Lie with me.”But he refused and said to his master”s wife, “Look, my master does not know what is with me in the house, and he has committed all that he has to my hand”. Genesis 39:7-8

Jesus encourages us to pick up the cross and follow him. This is an invitation to saying no to sin and self-gratifying habits for the sake of having a relationship with Him. We need to say no to ungodly relationships, desires of our flesh, self-defeating habits and temptation to sin.

 “Then Jesus said to His disciples, “If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me”. Matthew 16:24 NKJV

The writer is the CEO/Founder -Pinnacle of Praise Show an outreach wing of Pinnacle of Praise Ministries. She is the Host of Pinnacle of Praise Show(TV) and In the Wings of our Stories(Radio) and the Author of a Woman of Influence: Empowered by God. She is a Professional Counselor, a conference & Motivational Speaker and addresses topics on Emotional and Spiritual Stability.

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